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The Big Day is approaching. We are heading to Hilton Head this afternoon and I won't be home again until I'm a mother-in-law.

Ick.

Mother. In. Law. That has such a horrid connotation. MILs are awful people who interfere and boss around hapless DILs and make them miserable. I don't want to be that type of MIL.

Mothers of daughters can do things to daughters, say things to daughters, be certain ways with daughters that are absolutely forbidden to mothers of the in-law variety. I know this. I know this because I have a MIL myself. My own mother might have said the exact same thing as my MIL and I would accept it from Mom but not from Ruth. Because, Mom was MOM and Ruth was not. She was His Mom, and that is not the same.

I have sons and so I will never get away with saying the same thing to my daughters of the heart that I could have possibly said to daughters of the womb. I know I can say things to my sons that no one else can. It is because I am the Mom, the one and only Mom. Regardless of anything else ever, I'm the Mom.

I assume this is the same with stepmothers, although I don't have much experience with that. My parents were on their starter marriage as were my in-laws, as am I. I would think the whole issue with stepparents is the 'you aren't my parent' variety and is true because the stepparent is NOT the parent. And so, as the MIL I need to remember I am not the mother.

Luckily, my DIL is wonderful. She is beautiful inside and out. She is fun and funny. She is artistic and practical. She is industrious and yet has time to give to others. She shares well. She is a great cook. She has beautiful children, although that may be partly due to my own gene pool. Regardless, the kids are great, too.

We have known each other for years. We have laughed and cried together for years. We have looked at Joe and wondered for years. We have hugged and kissed babies for years. This really is nothing new. It is the same, but different.

I wish … I want … my DIL to always know she is welcome to all I have. I am giving her one of the most precious things I've ever – not quite possessed, but felt was my own. I am giving her my precious son. One of my favorite people in all the world. And that's just the beginning.

I know she has a mother. But now, with a twist of the legal system, I'm going to have a daughter. I am so thrilled. A girl. I've always wanted one.

Thanks, Joe, for getting me a daughter. And such a great one, too.